The homey Joe Bartholomew going for his on the stand-up circuit…had me rolling. Watch and laugh.
Grandpa Wants Justin Bieber Dead
Same set, two medleys, and Cher (who could get the business back then). Who wins by a landslide? Go.
Cher & The Jackson 5 – Jackson 5 Medley
Cher & The Osmonds – Stevie Wonder Medley
BONUS WAR! Who had the better cartoon intro?
The Osmonds Cartoon
The Jackson 5 Cartoon
Well? What’s the verdict?
This shit just had me dying. haha. Biggups to my homey Cesar for hipping me to this one.
The record business has changed dramatically in the past 30 years, but putting yourself out there to get noticed is still the same. In some ways it’s different (ads in trade mags, standing outside of labels, calling in favors, cold calling, breaking the bank on unsolicited demos, etc) and in some ways it’s the same (eating dicks / sucking up, playing shows to build a following, and having talent (which is somewhat questionable in most cases these days)).
So what we have here is an old school ad for a group of three people trying to get noticed. They have a nice rudimentary graphic that meets up with their logo on some old school clashing of five different fonts. Obviously, this is before photoshop so someone put in work cutting film and lining up this ad in a very sloppy way on a light table. I only know this because I learned it back in high school in South Bend….why they taught us this in the age of computers is a mystery to me.
The only reason I’m really posting this is because of Vernon. This is pure speculation, but I’m going to go out on a limb and say that Vernon is smashing Vicki Rae something terrible. He has that old school “Mike, I’m all up in this biatch so back the hell up” smile with an accompanying arm clamp on what he’s claiming as his in the demo picture. Mike prob had the money to pay for the ad and “demos” plus the songwriting skills and talent. I put demos in quotes because who knows if it was a physical 8 track tape or vinyl record…or maybe they really just waited around by the phone and tried to sing live to anyone who called?
It appears that the telephone number is from Santa Ynez California…which appears to be desolate land somewhere up the Cali coast. I bet that was a real hotbed for disco shit back in the day.
So…I wonder if they ever made it? I wonder if Vernon will answer if you call the number?
I wonder if Vicki Rae went solo and finally made a record under the name Vicki Rae Von and this is it (below)? The song was produced by Tom Brasfield and he appears to be a disco producer who ended up writing a big hit for Ronnie Milsap. Oh shit, now I’m really tripping cause I use to bang that hit Ronnie Milsap song on my am radio back in the day.
Fuck. Now I’ve gotta get off into some Ronnie Milsap shit. Why did I just find out that he’s blind? I thought he was rocking shades all those years to be cool. Here’s the kicker: I thought Roy Orbison was blind because he rocked shades his entire career and then he turned out to not be blind at all. Wtf?! My blindar is way off.
Ronnie Milsap – (There’s No) Gettin’ Over Me
But now that I’ve lost all control of this post…look at these cats from the Fukuoka American Music Association trying to put it down on the same song:
Where to begin? I guess I’ll start with this: I’ve had this ad in my “to post” folder for awhile, but I never actually researched Mrs. Miller until a few minutes ago. Matter of fact, I only created this particular blog the other day so we’re just now getting into the groove over here. It seems that I’m a little late to the starting line on this artist as a quick search reveals a bunch of blogs and sites that have covered this already. I could very well be the only one with the OG ad though, but whatevers holmes. Without reading any of them, I’m just going to dive in on my own with limited info and tell you about Mrs. Miller.
Starting with the ad…She looks like she should be on a pasta jar, right? Granted, I’ve shuffled through tens of thousands of old LPs looking for samples and this cover is only modestly jacked up compared to some of the stuff I’ve seen. In total stream of consciousness writing, this just reminded me of the time Silva and I stopped by an “album cover” art gallery show after skating one day…shit was sweet. Back to Mrs. Miller, why is she holding the mic out like an emcee? She’s holding that shit like she’s stroking something or like she’s about to get it in in the booth…or both (insert Eric Burdon “Spill The Wine” story here).
The song selection on this Greatest Hits album looks excellent with a variety of pop hits. This has to be good right? You be the judge:
Mrs. Miller – Downtown
Mrs. Miller – Strangers in the Night
Mrs. Miller – The Girl From Ipanema
Ok. What the flying fuck was Capitol thinking? This has to be a joke right? Good God.
Having spent some time in the tower myself here and there, let me sidetrack this again with another story: I have a video somewhere of me showing my homey how to get past Capitol security, hit the elevator, stairs, and boom…the roof. So just know that footage exists of Dj Marvski jumping over the ledge on the roof of the Capitol building and dancing around because he was so excited to be up there. One more step and it would’ve been a done deal for the legend.
Anyway, this chick, Mrs. Miller, isn’t so good. I can just see some 60s version of a Ron Lafitte, still dressed the same, signing her like she was going to be the next big thing. Maybe a current “A&R” will venture out to Claremont now and find a school teacher to sign just to spice up the industry a little, eh? That would be a true Hell Yeah!!!
Seriously, it seems like she eventually caught on to the fact that the world was laughing at her and it can be summed up in this sentence from her Wikipedia page:
“She apparently was unaware at first that her musical ability was being ridiculed, but eventually realized it and decided to go along with the joke. She attributed her break with Capitol to her wanting to sing correctly and record ballads, while Capitol wanted to continue the “so bad it’s good” style.”